Friends, there is a perception out there by some that I “do it all.”
I really, really despise that false perception.
“Do it all” implies that I do “it” ALL. What is “all?” I do a few things that I believe God has called me to do, and sometimes I do them well, and sometimes I completely botch them.
Here’s what I do:
- I mother
- I homeschool my 6 year old
- I wife
- I blog
- I write
- I host a conference
- I speak
Let me break it down:
I cuddle with my babes every morning when they wake up. All three of us sleep together in the mornings, and it is the sweetest thing ever. We get up, we have breakfast, sometimes my babes watch some TV, sometimes they play, sometimes we go to the gym. I’m trying to make bible time during breakfast an anchor, something consistant for them. Their jobs are to make their beds, help me clean up, and unload the dishwasher. This does not happen at the same time every day. Some mornings we have a friend over, or go to a friends house, swimming lessons, kids museum or science museum (depending on the season/day). My 6 year old takes piano lessons, ballet lessons (for $5 a week – a missionary at a church teaches worship ballet), and swim lessons. My 5 year old son and 3 year old daughter only take swimming lessons.
Then I do lessons with my 6 year old, which is very simple and doesn’t take much time. We do math, reading, and bible. Soon we will also be doing art. My other two play, or color, or watch TV during this time. Side note: we stopped all lessons except for reading from January until May because my daughter was overwhelmed and was struggling with reading. We picked back up in May.
After lunch, my babes have quiet times – my 3 year old naps and the other two play quietly in our play room.
After naps they play or have a friend over, or help me clean or go on errands. Every day is different.
My husband gets home at 3:30 every day, and so we spend time together, have a very early dinner (usually around 4:30) and then we just hang out.
Exciting stuff, eh?
My husband and I have landed in a wonderful groove with each other, and so we aren’t always striving to “work on our marriage.” We love each other, we enjoy hanging out with each other, we make each other laugh, and we do business together. He helps me run the conference, and he’s dipping his toes into the possibility of starting a business where we work together. We have a good thing.
I blog mostly in the evenings after my babes go to bed (they go sleep around 8:30). Sometimes I don’t blog because I’m tired or want to watch a movie with the hubs. I’m fine with not blogging every day. I also have an assistant who helps me with email, affiliates, and other tasks; she’s amazing. She also runs the Allume blog.
I have written eBooks here and there. For 31 Days to Clean I got up around 5am in the morning to work on it. Also, it wasn’t a book from scratch, I took posts and revised them and that is what made up 31 Days to Clean (and Frumps to Pumps). I only wrote two “new content” eBooks, and both of those I mostly worked on in the evenings. I probably wasn’t blogging very much during the writing of those eBooks. When it came to writing Desperate, I had to hire someone to help during the week, and I was able to do that because of the success of my other eBooks. I have a grad student come once a week for a few hours to clean my house and play with my babes. I would not be able to write a book if I didn’t have her. Also, my husband usually gives me Saturday mornings or an evening to write. I took two months off my blog while writing Desperate. Also, when you are compelled to do something, you just do it, you find ways.
I host a conference
I agonized over whether or not to keep doing the conference. My husband and I prayed, sought out council, and talked it over a thousand times. We believe God led us to this conference, and we made the decision to keep doing it (but we hold it loosely; only as God leads). As for working on it, I mainly work on the conference on Saturday mornings, or while driving somewhere (this is when I make phone calls), in the evenings, or during my kids quiet times. I schedule all meetings with sponsors during those quiet times. I also have an amazing team of women who work with me, and so we spread out the work. We each operate according to our strengths so the work is fun/easier. I also meet once a month with my co-host to work on the conference (this is usually on a Saturday when my husband will do something with our kiddos). I was going to host a second conference, but realized it would be too much, so I canceled it.
I rarely speak. I’m not aspiring to be a speaker, and I choose very carefully what I’m willing to do. I don’t like being away from my family, so I set pretty strict boundaries on my travel time.
Sometimes I mess it all up and feel terrible. My life is not wrapped up in some box with a bow. I’m selfish and lazy. I struggle with listening to voices other than God’s (“You shouldn’t…” You should…”). But, I’m also an overcomer. I choose to not stay in my sin. I go to God, I accept His grace and wisdom, and start over. I persevere in my ideals. I don’t give up.
So no, I don’t do it all. I do the things that I believe God has chosen for my life. I’m walking by faith and leaning into Him every step of the way.
Why do you think we use the term “do it all” flippantly? What does it mean to “do it all”?
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