For the Ordinary Mom

ordinarymom

My little girl threw up last night.

We were cuddled up having family movie night, watching The Grinch, when she said, “Mom, can I go to bed early?”

“Sure, honey. Are you okay?”

“I don’t feel good.”

I got up with her and we walked together up to her bedroom. I got her bed ready, and just as I was getting a trashcan to put by her bed, she went to the bathroom and threw up.

I held her hair.

I cleaned her up.

And I tucked her into bed with lullabies playing on her CD player.

“Mom, you don’t have to stay, I don’t want you to get sick.”

“It’s okay, God make moms to take care of their babies, and to comfort them.”

She smiled wearily.

I snuggled up to her and rubbed her head. Soon, she feel asleep.

I came downstairs and, after tucking the other little ones into bed, and I got into my own bed. I leaned over to my husband and told him how glad I was to be able to comfort our children.

I told him how I have no memories of a mama cuddling up to me, rubbing my head, and nurturing me, sick or otherwise. But no matter, because I can do that for my babies. And it occurred to me how often I think of myself as a failure as a mom. I don’t teach them scripture enough, read to them enough, do enough. Sometimes I let them watch too much T.V., and I wonder, “Am I just a big failure as a mom?”

You know what? No! I’m not a failure as a mom, and neither are you.

I’m deciding right now not to focus on my weaknesses, or my failings, but rather on the fact that I love my children and they are taken care of, nurtured, prayed over, snuggled into, and invested in.

Not perfectly, but lovingly, by the grace of God.

I do a ton of things wrong, but God gave me these children, and He knew my personality, my weaknesses, and my strengths. And He made me a mama.

I think the enemy wants us so focused on our weaknesses so that we can forget about all the good things we bring to our children.

I especially think that if you’re concerned if you’re doing a good job or not, you probably are a great parent.

So here’s the bottom line: Keep on loving your babes with what you’ve got and who you are. Focus on the good things; parent through your strengths. Don’t compare. And when you’re really struggling with thoughts of failure, remember Paul’s words in Romans 7:15-23:

For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.

Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.

So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.

You are not alone in your feelings of failure. But you are not a failure. You are a good mom. So you friend, you keep on.

Keep on.

Sarah Mae

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  • http://www.aworkinprogress.us/ Matthew Snider

    I love moments like this, been there so many times with my three little girls.

    Such a wonderful thing to think that Moms and Dads were made to take care of these precious little gifts from God.

  • http://www.amyfritzswrites.wordpress.com/ amyfritz

    I feel so bad for my kids when they get sick, but I love that I can help make them feel better.

  • Janelle

    Every day I feel like a failure. Every day I beat myself up. I listen to the lies. I wish I could break out of this nasty cycle running through my head.

    Janelle

  • http://joyfulmothering.net Christin

    I love you. xoxo :)

  • Kay

    My own mother was a no-nonsense kind of woman. But when we were sick she made us special food and was extra caring. My best childhood memories! I, too, have heard the Enemy whisper that I am ‘not enough’. I am learning to listen to the Great Encourager instead. By the grace of God i can be enough. Thank you for this great encouragement!

  • kitchensinkmom

    So true and encouraging. God created me to be their mom…ME! No one else can do it better. Thanks for the reminder.

  • Nikki

    After yesterday, these are words I needed to hear! Thank you.

  • Kathleen

    You are always a Blessing! Thank You! :-)

  • Julie

    Oh my. I’m sitting here on my bed reading this with the lingering smell of throw up because this very thing happened to me last night ( complete with me feeling like a failure after trying unsuccessfully all day to motivate children to clean and just ending up being angry most of the day)…I needed to hear this. thank you. I do so much wrong but I do love my children and i want to be a great mom. grateful I could cuddle up with the sickie for awhile in the night…

  • Nicole at WKH

    I love this post – it always helps me to remember when I feel under attack by others or just like a failure that God doesn’t make mistakes! He knew my son was to be mine, and I was to be my son’s mama. He will equip me as time goes on! :)

    Blessings,
    Nicole